Aakhir e shab ke humsafar, Faiz na jaanay kya huwe...

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Alfaaz hain ke, zehreelay lehjoun mein bujhay huway teer

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

“If you could buy time, I would sell it. Yesterday would be expensive, and tomorrow would be cheap.”

Very very cheap.

Sukoon naami cheez itni nayaab kion hojaati hai baaz lougoun ki zindagiyoun mein?

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Kabhi kissi ko mukammal jahaan nahin milta
Kabhi zameen tou kabhi aasmaan nahin milta...

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

All that is lost my love, you still haven't reckoned fully.

It's tragic.

My heart bleeds for you, and forever it shall.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Sunday morning musings- right out of the bed

Mein hoon woh nang-e-khalq k kehti hai jisko khaak
Issko banna ke kiyon meri mitti kharaab ki...

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Of night, slumber and dreams on french leave.

Mere paas tou khwaab bhi nahin...

The pitch black curtain never rises after I close my eyes; losing hope, I open my eyes every morning.

Bittersweet symphony, turning a tad sour

Let me be that forgotten ornament lying in a neglected corner of the house. The one whose existence people don't notice anymore. The one nobody talks about. The ones that catch the eye of merely maid servants, every once a few days; who then pick up a duster to cursorily brush off any dust residues. Pray, let me be.

Mein bohat jaldi thaknay laggi hon ab. Chaar qadam chal ker he saans charh jaata hai.

I've become so volatile.

It's a bit too much, if you ask me. I've achieved the level where one starts to annoy one's own self.

One moment, all I crave for is solitude, while the next, it starts creeping me out. Kaheen jaanay ka dil nahin karta, aur ghar baith ker bezaari hoti hai.

Work was a get away. My dilemmas however, have started to envelope that too in dense clouds of grimness.

Only so much time left now.

'It's only a matter of time now'... someone told me. I have not looked away from the ticking hands of the clock ever since.

It's been a month now.

Lagta hai zamana guzar gaya.

Will I ever be happy again? Not that I want to be. No sir, not at all - mostly because it doesn't make a difference. It's just an objective question that I find myself asking the blank spaces around me often.

If there's something that I wish now, is to be indifferent. Not happy, (but!) nor miserable either. I want to live the rest of my life, as if riffling through the life of an independent third party. I wish not be expected anything of.

Pata nahin kya aafat agayee hai jo iss tarah behave karne laggi ho!

I'm getting sick and tired of you. I swear I am.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Kissi ko mera khayaal nahin

Dil chah raha hai k bachpan ki tarah aaj phir iss baat per rooun k, koi mujhse pyaar nahin karta, kissi ko mera khayaal nahin.

I thought she loved me, cared about me, and hence was by my side, standing right next to me, but...

*sighs*

You grow up to find out that stars aren't exactly glitter n sparkles sprinkled over the night sky; they're goddamn dead planets or whatever celestial bodies set on fire.

Right back at you, huh?

... Guess it was just a moment, without much to it, but erratic sentimental value.

The thing with moments is that they pass away, this one sure was no different.

I lose again. Ha!

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

... These pangs of deadly agony in my chest, that travel down my arms, to my wrists, and then hands. My veins, it feels as if they constrict with in a fractin of a second, resulting in nothing but sharper and deeper pangs of excruciating pain.

It hurts - from the inside out. It's tormenting.

Why won't anyone make it stop?

It hurts, goddamnit.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Mujhey ghuttan horahi hai.
Shadeed ghuttan.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Zindagi khaak na thi; khaak uraatay guzri...

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Ajeeb hai raat aur din ki gardish.

Lekin us'se ajeeb hain aap,  muhtarma!

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Hawwa tou nahin hai,  khaasa habs hai- wonder what blew out the candles then?
*sighs*

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

I can't  breathe.
Ajeeb wehshat si horahi hai sham ke baad se. Kuch sumujh nahin araha. Bohat besukooni hai,  bohat iztaraab.
The moonlit skies look beautiful.  The underglow that the moonlight creates as the clouds glaze over it,  is but plain wonder.
Magar bas phir achanak saara manzar dhundla gaya,  roshni bikhar si gayee,  aur aankhoun mein jallan ke siwa kuch nahin raha.

I can hear the clouds roar.  They sound upset...  It's raining.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Life, reverse blasts, Mr. Freeze and other disasters.

At time, it doesn't even allow a transitional period as it jumps from one happy moment to another miserable one. Life's weird that way. Oh, it sure is!

It sort of reminds me of something I studied back in school- digital and analogue signals/ values. Or binary data- It's 0 OR it's 1- and that's that. Or if we had to bring in the economic cycle, it would be something unlike the conventional cycle; minus the recession or recovery transitional phases.

Here, a sad attempt to illustrate it for you:

Well, on second thought, I guess they're there; so to speak. Although, they're more of something like as steep vertical drop, yes, a roller coaster drop perhaps- and ohhh! Not just any other drop; it's like the 90 degree drop of Mr. Freeze from Six Flags, to be precise.

Holy skittles! Eureka!!!

I think I just figured life out. Just as I typed the last line, it occured to me- like an epiphany. It's the new Mr. Freeze: Reverse Blast.

Damnit! I've got it all figured... *walks away slowly, mumbling to herself- flabbergasted at the discovery*

Giggly Revelations

*S, Z, and I searching for how some of the renowned designers looked like*

Search: 1 - Tommy Hilfiger
Google didn't search him for us for some unknown reason, however did give us 'people also search for' recommendations. So, we went ahead with that.

Search: 2 - Paco Rabbane
*weird face*
S: Aise tou humaray chowkidaar!

Search: 3 - Kenneth Cole
S: Aye haye! Bechara! Lagta hai ke waqai watches banata hoga!

Search: 4 - Yves Saint LaurentS: Sunkee buddha!


Search: 5 - Christian Dior
*drum rolls*
....
*flabbergasted*
Me: He's a.... man!? O_o
*weird pause*
S: He is a ganja?! And not a ganjee?!!!
*wants to faint*

And the search went on... treading along similar lines.

P.S. A draft from a few months ago.

Dear blogger,

I suppose I'll be seeing you more often now.

Ann.

Average life expectancy

Bas itni si zindagi hoti hai khushiyoun ki...

As long as it takes for an eye to open up after a blink.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

The flagbearer of wrongdoings

You somehow end up being wrong all the time.  ALL THE TIME.  How do you do it?  How do you manage?  Must be really tough,  huh?
I find it funny,  I'm so sorry,  I kinda sorta do. 
*smirks*

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

You wake up and you sleep. A few murmurs in between. A sleepy smile; a grin if lucky. A recipe for fuzz.

Only if the spaces could've shrunk to a breath.

Aik aur sach

Aur sach tou yeh bhi hai ke,  kuch lougoun ko khushiyaan raas nahin aati.  Aur kabhi woh khushiyoun ko raas nahin aatay.
Tou bas phir nateeja kuch youn hota hai k,  barra mukhtasar sa saath hota hai inn lougoun ka aur khushiyoun ka.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Mein bohat khud gharz hon shayed.  Apne dukh k aagay,  kisi aur ka dukh,  kisi aur ki pareshaani koi maaene he nahin rakhti.
Saari duniya aag ki laptoun mein jhulas rahi hai tou kya? Mujhe tou bas apni ragoun mein uth'ti huwi teesoun ki azeeyat ka ehsaas,  aur kuch nahin,  kuch bhi nahin.
Ya shayed,  bohat behiss hon.  Behissi k aala tareen darje per faaiz.
...  *smiles*

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

The last laugh

Who's laughing now?

Tou kya sab khatam hogaya?

*smiles*

Kitna bewaqoofana sawaal hai... But can I blame you, my precious? *shakes head* Beyaqeeni hai ke khatam he nahin honay mein aati...

Eik lehze mein paaon ke neeche se zameen khenchi gayee... kuch pata he na chala. Itni taizi se ke, abhi tou nuqsaan ka andaaza bhi nahin ho paaya theek theek.

Har guzarta din eik nayye nuqsaan ka ehsaas liye howe aayega ab tou.

.... *shakes head*

Hai youn bhi ziyaan aur youn bhi ziyaan...

Kuch din tou basso meri aankhon main
Phir khawab agar ho jao tou kya

Koi rung tou do mere chehray ko
Phir zakham agar mehkao tou kya

Ik aaina tha so toot gaya
Ab khud se agar sharmao tou kya

Main tanha tha, main tanha hoon
Tum aao tou kya, Na aao tou kya

Jab hum he na mehkay phir sahib
Tum baad-e-saba kehlao tou kya

Jab daikhnay wala koi nahin
Bujh jao tou kya, jal jao tou kya

Eik weham hai yeh duniya is mein
Kuch kho'o tou kya aur paao tou kya

Hai youn be ziyaan aur youn bhi ziyaan
Jee jao tou kya mar jaao tou kya...

-Obaidullah Aleem

Saturday night sighs.

This!

Is as close as it gets.

*smiles half-heartedly*

Meeloun ke faaslay tou tay kiye jasakte hain, magar sawal yeh hai ke naseeboun ke faaslay kis tarah tay hon?

Saturday night musings

Haven't felt so empty in a very long time. So hollow, so weightless. Things would have been so much easier had I been not such a goddamn attention craving creature.
*shakes head and smiles*
The tragedy of my life is that I somehow cannot find someone to blame, but myself... Every time, every.... time.
Why do I have to be so insatiable when it comes to affection and care? There is only so much people can give away... *smirks* And suddenly, I make it sound like alms, and not love.

-

The clenched fist you hold in front of yourself, you are afraid of opening it, aren't you? Almost as if you are afraid whatever you were holding on to so tightly shall not be there any longer. And truth be told, my precious, it isn't there, is it now? You know it too, don't you? That whisper you keep drowning in your noisy delusions, it keeps popping its head up every now and then. You'll have to lend it an ear sooner or later, love- sooner or later.

Rah e hasti ke iss jalte safar mein
Tumhari yaad ka saaya bohat hai...

P.S. Absolutely adore the Dil e Muztar OST.

Pata nahin kahan se eik dum he itni saari udaasi aakar kissi gard alood hawa k jhonke ki tarah apni lapait mein le kar saara wujood matti matti kardeti hai...
*sighs*

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Iztaraab dar iztaraab.

Aur wajah? Nadaarad.

*shakes head and smiles vapidly*

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Heart, diving boards, and other absurd things.

Heart's been taking plunges lately. Irrespective of the brevity, it gets soaked pretty bad, in the slimy substance that the unidentified woes are made of.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Maps, distances, and other funny things

It's funny how distances work...

I have come to realise physical distances might not matter so much after all. They do in the end however, since we are insatiable beings, always wanting more. But that's another story altogether, so let's keep it at that.

 People have been farther away and I've missed them less than I miss them now, when they're nearer. I say nearer because that's what running my fingers over the maps tell me.

*smiles*

I hate him.

I know I shall regret documenting this thought one day... but right now, it is all I know- all I can think of.

Itna bay'hiss koi kaise hosakta hai.

Life of Ann

So bland.
So listless.
So mechanical.
Exactly in line with the standard operating procedures.
Pathetic, in short.
I need to have hobbies, interests that I can take up as leisure activities.
I'm rotting myself, and very elegantly so.
And with that thought, I shall now take leave.
I have a life, in rotting, to attend...
Cheers.
Weekends, ftw.
Ridiculous.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Shaheed ho gaye kuch aur teray laal Hussain (as)

Jo reh gaye hain unhain ab tu he sambhaal Hussain (as)...

A hundred years

Promise me you'll never forget me. Ever. Not even when I'm a hundred, said Winnie the Pooh.

[...] I wont... If you are promising me (the same) then... I won't want to live so long, replied someone.

... *silence prevailed*

♣

In a parallel universe:

Promise me you'll never forget me. Ever. Not even when I'm a hundred, said Winnie the Pooh.

[...] I wont... If you are promising me (the same) then... I won't want to live so long, replied someone.

... Even with me?, asked Winnie the Pooh.

Day 3

And here I am, reporting from a pit of incessant gum-in-the-hair kind despair- still.

Bloody starwberry flavoured starburst!

Unwrapped, still

She got back home in the evening to see the same bag lying in the corner beside her bedside table. It caught her attention for a very brief moment, but not a single facial muscle moved to form an expression. The brief moment ended rather quickly, and she looked away; getting back to whatever she came into the room for.
-
She got back home yesterday evening, and was told a gift was awaiting her in her room. She walked into the room nonchallantly, pulled the wrapped present out of the bag, had a look at it for a moment, and left it on the bed letting out a silent sigh.

It was later returned to the  bag, and kept aside. A weight shifted on to her shoulders.

Poofy creatures, hugs, and other disasters

At times, all you need is a hug.

*sighs*

Pophoo ne eik martaba bachpan mein meri donon hatheliyaan jorr ker haathoun ka baghour  jaaiza lete huwe kaha tha ke, yeh jo ' ب ' (bay) ban raha hai na, kehte hain ke woh shaks barra bakht wala hota hai.

Uss lamhay nadaan sa zehra bohat khush huwa tha, mera tou bilkul perfect ب banta hai... kissi ne barray he rashk se soocha tha.

Aur aaj... jurri huwi hatheliyoun ke imperfect aur incomplete se ب ke saath, unki baat ka yaqeen karne ko dil chahta hai.

...

*sighs*

These pangs- they are murderous.
I need saving.

Purty, so purty, the please is.

Can I swear?

Purty please!!!

Ugh!

I want to.

I really really really want to.

I promise, I'll just curse indistinctly like Muttley.

You know who Muttley is right?

*squints at you condescendingly*

Khonay ke liye hain, aur na paanay ke liye hain
Kuch loug tou khwaaboun mein basaanay ke liye.

Has anybody ever seen a tomato grin?

Penguin

I hereby penguin-ishly declare penguin to be a verb, and an expression.

So, all you out there who believed penguin was a flightless burdie, hence a noun only, you stand corrected. Thanks to me.

Ha!

I wish I could just cease doing things that leave me feeling thoroughly absurd and ridiculous.

If only I could help being high almost always, and not be so silly- or perhaps doing exactly the opposite of it might help.

*considers earnestly*

Yes, I suppose I should remain high all the time, so that I the realisation never hits me.

That way I'd remain in a twisted bliss, others (?) yeah, no, things won't change much for them. They must continue to suffer, at my pretty hands.

So... *thinks for a second*... yeah, I should now go get more fancy bongs to interest me.

(*facepillow*)

“When I am with you, we stay up all night.
When you're not here, I can't go to sleep.
Praise God for those two insomnias!
And the difference between them.”

- Rumi

Watch out: Sappiness ahead.

'Sometimes the strongest people are the ones who love beyond all faults, cry behind closed doors, and fight battles that nobody knows about.'
- Author Unknown

Teen duniya'ain

Ammi jaani, looking up from Ashfaq Ahmed's Zaaviya:

Teenoun teen alag duniyaaon mein hain...

Tumharay papa apne engineering ke bakhairoun mein,

Tum sair-o-safar mein,

Aur mein rouhaniyat ke baaboun mein...

*smiles*

I'm reading again- Niklay Teri Talaash Mein by Mustansar Hussain. Thanks to a silly friend of mine.

Oh and... Isn't tea love, the best love?

*slurps on evening tea*

Ah.

Reminds me of... sloth.

...

Weather update: Clouds giving way to some sun

Sab kuch kitna dhulla dhulla sa, ujla sa hai ab.

Raat ke pichlay pehr jo meena barasna shuru howa tou, dopehr se kuch dair qabl thamma...

Matl'a saaf tou nahin, magar sooraj ki aankh machouli achi lag rahi hai.

Kitna khoobsurat sa hota hai, baarish tham jaanay ke baad sooraj ka pehli baar abr ki oat se jhankna.

Labels

... So, I thought I should actually create a new label, called 'Out of the drafts'.
I have 72 posts lying in my drafts.
... Mhmm!

... only too familiar.

Tum aaj bhi waheen kharri ho, they over heard someone whisper to her.

The voice continued resonating in the silence, until the whispers lurking in the distance raised their heads.

She's here again? But why? May be her compass is broken. Perhaps, she's going round in circles, without knowing. It's not the compass. I think it is. Wonder why her compass acts up with her all the time? Perhaps, it likes tricking her. Or.... may be, just may be, that compass of hers is a sadist who fell for her smile. Her smile? *said some in puzzled tone* Shush! Look at her... that smile. It's... bleeding. I know- isn't it beautiful? It... It sadly is...

Silence.

Stood there- she did, still as the night- only noticeable movement being the subtle movement of her pupils, the quiver of her lashes. She could hear them speak, those voices; hushed tones, whispers, piercing her senses without remorse. She could feel them- staring at her discreetly, from the darkness.

She doesn't seem to be in good shape. What did you expect? *someone berated* She hates it- being here. Why? *someone didn't know*  It's only too familiar, of course.... 

A little too much.

I find it kinda funny, I find it kinda sad...

It's the irony, that's killing me....

Being the sinner that I am, I've always had it in my mind that I may not get what I pray for as easily as I would like to. However, I've always had faith in His mercy. And, He has been immensely merciful. I never thought I deserved all that I've ever had. I cannot thank Him enough. So, this isn't a complain. Not that I've any right to complain, in any case.

This is just a statement- of facts, of the way life works, and of irony.

I've always wished for a particular thing- Always. I wish I could explain to you the emphasis on 'always'. Yes, I've wished and prayed for it as much as I could've. I always hoped that Allah saa'iin would listen to me, despite all my sins. I had faith. But then again, somewhere at the back of my head, there was a fear lurking silently in a dark corner. What if.... what if my prayers go unheard; and all that only and only because of my sins. I thought perhaps the Lord might decide to punish me for my sins in this manner.

But, I was wrong. I've got what I wished for. But there's a twist (of course)...

And, the twist is.... that when I've almost got what i always wished for, I realise that I don't want it any longer. In fact, now I want not to have it!

May be it's a test. May be it's a retribution. Or may be, I am just being ungrateful.

Ephemeral pleasures, or are they?

"You've spoiled me; for anywhere else, anybody else. Do you know that?"

"What do I do now?"

"What do I do when all this ceases to be?"

"You never know, it might as well not."

"I know! And I've come to terms with it."

Remember when I asked you about that particular species of tropical plant, which I loved so dear to have it planted in my garden; but I could not because it could not thrive in this climate, in this environment.

I told you, it would die here; and then I asked you, if I should still plant it in my garden.

Remember what you said? You told me everything dies- a mother does not refuse to bear her child because one day he shall die. She simply does not do that. She, despite knowing that her child is not eternal, everlasting, and is but mortal, bears him, goes through all that agony to bring him to this world.

I told you I did not want that dear plant to die, just because of a whim of mine.

You told me, it wasn't sensible to choose to not do certain things in our lives out of mere fear of grim outcomes.

You told me, irrespective of how things might turn out, we do certain things only because they mean so much to us, and in return what we get are some very precious moments, memories.

So... I... rooted the plant.

I have come to terms with it.

I do not know, certainly, what I'd do when all this ceases to be, but... all I know, and all that matters right now, is that I'm collecting moments, memories; precious memories that would last for an eternity.

I'm not going to let even a single minute to go to waste.

There's so little time, so many memories to collect.

Better get back to work, shall we?

Maseeha'ee

Hum akser koshish karte hain lougon ko khush karne, khush rakhne ki, woh loug jo humein azeez tar hote hain.

Magar baraha aisa bhi dekha hai, ke humari har koshish be soud, har saee lahasil reh jaati hai.

Mareez tab tak roo ba'sehat nahin hota, jab tak ussay sahi dawwa na di jaaye.

Waa'ye naseeb, woh dawwa mere bas mein nahin.

Choose, my precious, you must.

'There comes a time when you have to choose between turning the page and closing the book', I read somewhere.

I closed the book.

I think I did.

-

I was later told, the book had been closed quite a while ago.

I don't follow.

Replace-me-not

Replace-ability.
We agreed that I had an issue with it.
And that it was an ouchiee concept.
Things are replace-able. People, not so much.
Mostly, because they should not be, not essentially.
It's violating, desecrating. 
But then, something happened- despite all agreements...
I was no longer needed.

Mujhe aisa kion lag raha tum kissi sehra se chal ker arahi ho..?
Kion?
Thakki huwi si, pyaasi si lag rahi ho...
Tabiyat theek hai tumhari?
Jee, theek hai bilkul, Allah ka shuker.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Oblivion

I wish I knew what's going on in this little head of mine.

Khuser phuser

I wish to write- write again.

Of those voices inside my head. Voices that speak not to me, but to one another only. I am merely an uninvited audience; an eavesdropper perhaps.

But that doesn't matter.

What matters is that they've started whispering again, in hushed tones, and otherwise.

The voices, they're speaking again.

For our own good

You and I- Let's appreciate the surface only, shall we; and not bother about what's underneath?

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Jis ne apne khoon se aalam ko dhoya, woh Hussain (AS)

Hussain jis ki sad'a, la illa ha illallah.

Hussain jis ki san'a, la illa ha illallah.

Hussain jis ki dua la, illa ha illallah!

Dil hai k parhoun aaj mey Shabbir (AS) ka hamla!
Buth khaanoun pay tauheed ki tasveer ka hamla
Kuffaar pay jabbr ki shamsheer ka hamla
Shabbir ka hamla hai k taqdeer ka hamla?

- Shaukat Raza Shaukat

Musings Today

Sighs.
I fail miserably, everytime- in my attempt to see, if life's failing me, or if I'm failing it.
Either way, I'm miserable.
I feel like setting fire to things, n watch them burn, silently.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Hussain(AS) likhna

Khuloos-e-dil ki roshnaee lay ker

Ba-deed-e-ter Hussain likhna

Tum aisa karna kitab-e-dil ke

Warq warq per Hussain likhna

Kasheed ker gulab ka arq

Fiza main peham charrak'na usko

Phir in sunehri fiza'oun per tum

Roshni ka paiker Hussain likhna

Azaan daingi tumhari aankhain

Namaz misray adaa karay gi

Tum aisa karna ke raah-e-Haq main

Hussain perh ker Hussain likhna

Haroof khushboo k phool bun ker

Tumharay seenay main khil uthaingay

Tum aisa karna k apni aankhon

Aur aapne lub per Hussain likhna

Tumharay tareek manzar'oun main

Ujalay phootaingay noor bun ker

Tum aisa karna k apnay ghar main

Darood parh ker Hussain likhna

Hussain likh ker phir usko likhna

Phir isko likh ker tum aisa karna

Ke aaj tak jo bhi likha ho

Tum uska mehwar Hussain likhna

Wo barchiyaa'n wo chamktay khanjer

Wo taptay sehra pukarty hain

Tum aisa kerna ke Karbala ke

Badan pe ja ker Hussain likhna

Ager kitabat ka shouq ho to

Kitab-e-sabr-o-raza main Rahat

Jahan shaheedou'n ka naam likhna

Tou sub se oper Hussain likhna

-Syed Rahat Hussain Rahat

Tangy nights

Here's how a midnight craving for tang goes by:

Me: Ooh i had to make you tang, din mein right?
S: Yes, you did. *frowns*
Me: Koi aur tang piye ga?
Others: *shake head*
Me: *making tang*
Me: *spots a baby roachie in the glass i had reserved for S*
Me: *brainstorming, dosra tang banaon, yahi de deti hon, ussay thori pata chalay ga, but that would be unethical, kya karoun, but then yeh zaya hojayega, pura glasss...*
Me: S... woh tumharay glass mein baby coakroach nikla pata nahin kahan se, just when i poured in the water.
S: Tou apna mujhe dedou, tum le lou cockroach wala.
Me: Magar woh tumhara glass tha.
S: Kya matlab mera glass tha, naam tou nahin likha hota.
Me: No, but i decided that was going to be yours and and this was to be mine.
S: Koi baat nahin, tum le lou, dosra mujhe dedo.
S: ... Acha dedou!
Me: *grins* Mein dosra banadoun if you don't want to drink it. *hopes to the core of the heart she says no, all hail laziness*
S: Koi baat nahin.
Me: Waise just so you don't feel bad, i took the roachie out with the spoon and then stirred my tang with the same spoon on purpose. So, that sirf tumhara tang roach wala na ho.
S: *gives a weird look, and a smile doubting my mental health*
Me: *grins*

'America he chhor aati  aap issay!'

Kuch alfaaz bazahir itne azaarda nahin maloom hotay, magar qabr ka haal tou murda he janta hai na.

*smiles*

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Metamorphosis

Aksar mehaz eik lehza he darkaar hota hai, mehaz eik lehza, barsoun puraane khuloos aur muhabbat ko nafrat mein badalane ke liye.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Unreasonable reasoning

Only if you could truly recollect and realise how little time we have- I have...
Perhaps then only you might have discovered reason underlining my unreasonableness.

Introspect

Main tujhay chahta nahi laikin

phir bhi jab paas tu nahi hoti

khud ko kitna udaas pata hoon

gom say apnay hawaas pata hoon

janay kya dhun samai rehti hai

ik khamoshi si chai rehti hai

dil say bhi guftagu nahi hoti

Main tujhay chahta nahi laikin

phir bhi reh reh kay meray kanon mein

goonjti hai teri haseen aawaz

jaisay na-deeda koi bajta saaz

har sada nagawar hoti hai

dil ki dharkan bhi baar hoti hai

in sukoot-ashna taranon mein

Main tujhay chahta nahi laikin

phir bhi shab ki taweel khilwat mein

teray awqaat sochta hoon main

teri har baat sochta hoon main

kon say phool tujh ko bhaatay hain

rang kya kya pasand aatay hain

kho saa jata hoon teri jannat mein

Main tujhay chahta nahi laikin

phir bhi ehsaas say nijaat nahi

sochta hoon to ranj hota hai

dil ko jaisay koi dubota hai

jis ko itna sarahta hoon main

jis ko iss darjaa chahta hoon main

us mein teri si koi baat nahi

- Janisar Akhtar

Shayed hadd-e-aflaak ke uss paar bhi mein tha..

Loogon Ke Lye Saahib-e-Kirdaar Bhi Mein Tha
Khud Apni Nigaahon Mein Gunaahgaar Bhi Mein Tha
Kiun Ab Mere Mansab Ki Salaami Ko Kharay Ho ?
Yaaro Kubhi Ruswa Sar-e-Baazaar Bhi Mein Tha
Mein Khud Hee Chhupa Tha Qaf-e-Qaatil Ki Shikan Mein
Maqtool Ki Tooti Howi Talwaar Bhi Mein Tha
Chheentay Hain Jahan Ab Mere Maasoom Lahoo Ke
Uss Farq-e-Falak-Naaz Ki Dastaar Bhi Mein Tha
Meri Hee Sadaa Lout Ke Aayi Hai Mujhi Tak
Shayad Had-e-Aflaak Ke Uss Paar Bhi Mein Tha
Manzil Pe Jo Pohancha Hun Tou Maaloom Howa Hai !
Khud Apnay Lye Raah Ki Deewaar Bhi Mein Tha
Ab Mere Taaruf Se Guraiza Hai Tu Laikin
Kal Tak Teri Pehchaan Ki Mayaar Bhi Mein Tha
Dekha Tou Mein Afshaa Tha Har Ik Zehen Pe Mohsin
Socha Tou Pas-e-Parda Israar Bhi Mein Tha

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Ridic-culous!

I'm so bloody demanding.

Such gigantic attention seeker.

Pfft. I'm ridiculous.

From me.

"It looks like you need saving."

I can't say if I need saving, but you certainly do.

I need to save you- from myself.

I'm a time-bomb, and the clock's ticking. I need to get you as far as will be safe, from this explosive device.

I, on the other hand, cannot be saved. I'm a time-bomb after all, which has to but detonate. It's only fair.

Peaches

'I feel like peaches today.'
'And I feel like eating peaches.'
*A flustered look*
*A naive grin*

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Status 101- as at date.

Gratuitous, dispensable, inessential, needless, inessential, un-called for, nonessential, unwarranted.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

A speck

How tiny are you, my precious? How miniscule?

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

*

Sad endings aren't so bad, I believe.

They can be comforting- some sort of a twisted consolation, perhaps.

They emphasize, in a very subtle manner, how tragedies are not such novel or unprecedented events.

Churra lo haath tou jaanain...

Woh waadi jis jagah tum ho,
Woh mere dil k andar hai-
Tumhara ab juda hona,
Tumharay bas se bahar hai.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Dilemma

Kya humein dar apne se qareeb logoun ka dil torrnay ka hai, ya phir apne usooloun aur ana ke aaleeshan mujasmay...

All in a day's work no. 236

I, Gandhi, and Gopher busy neck deep in work.... Gandhi, in the meanwhile, also busy making absurdly cartoonish noises... Pauses for sec.
Gandhi:
'AH agar mein zyada annoying hone lagoun, I mean if you can't tolerate me anymore tou you can...
Me:
'Tou mein tumhein eik thapar maar doungee, tum fikr mat karo'
Gandhi, Gopher pause for a nanosec before going into a fit of laughter...
Gopher:
'oh boy!'
I join the fit too.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Yeh lamha...

'Aankhon mein rehta hai
Dil he mein behta hai
Kaccha sa ek khwaab hai...
Lagta sawaal hai
Shayad jawaab hai
Dil phir bhi betaab hai...
Yeh sukoo'n hai tou hai
Yeh junoo'n hai tou hai
Khoobsurat hai, jee lene de...
Yeh lamha, filhaal jee lene de.'

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Tu samundar, mein bhatki hui piyaas hon...

'Why?'

'... Because, you- are my birdie...!'

Itni jagah kahan hai....

Lagta nahin hai ji mera ujrray dyaar mein
Kis ki bani hai aalam-e-napa'edaar mein

Bulbul ko paasbaan se na siyaad se gila
Kismat mein qaid thi likhi fasl-e-bahaar mein

Keh dou yeh hasratoun se kaheen aur ja basain
Itni jagah kahan hai dil-e-daaghdaar mein

Bay-asbaat

Kis ko fursat ke mujhse behas karay

Aur saabit karay ke mera wujood...

Zindagi ke liye zaroori hai.

Dil ki taskee'n ka poochte hain aap?
Haan meri jaa'n, hogai hogi...

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.6

Hello there, she said.

So.... yeah.
*awkward pause*

Lol. I feel like a person amidst unfamiliar associates, or rather associates one meets up with after eons.

Well, life's the usual. One track. The track that I'm walking on despite being aware that it's the wrong track.

There used to be moments while playing NFS, when my ride used to drift 180 degrees (intentionally, or not sometimes), and then instead of turning and setting my ride in the right direction I would rather continue driving the wrong way- on purpose that is! With a continuous and annoying warning blinking in front of me, telling me that I am going in the wrong direction- The notification would blink in complete vain though. I didn't care.

There's a warning flashing in front of me now as well. A very close, a very similar warning. My reaction to it...? Exactly the same as always.

It was a not-so-good day today. I don't like being misunderstood.

I don't know what would've upset me more- being caught in a cross fire between the venting out of pent up rage, or knowing that the pent up rage was partly because of me. However, why does it matter. I came across both anyways, for all the wrong reasons nevertheless.

When you esteem people, you give them a license allowing them the ability to upset you.

At times, we end up being the most clumsy only when we are being extra careful.

At times, you try so bloody hard not to upset others, not just by your own actions but you also try to keep them from all possible things that might upset them. But then, you still end up upsetting them- and that too by your very own actions only. You might not be at fault. It might just be a mere misunderstanding. Nevertheless, they still end up upset. And then, you end up upset. And then, everything else ends up upset. And then, everybody lives happily ever after, not.

*deep breath*

Blogging has become synonymous with whining for me, it appears. All I do is express my anguish and despair. It's so heavy, the atmospheric pressure around my blog, lol. As I just mentioned it a while back to a friend, how I've started boring myself. Don't people have enough troubles in their own lives to rather read about someone else's whines, rants and ramblings. I, myself, don't watch depressing or heavy movies solely for the reason that I have enough practical bird-poo in my life to deal with, why would I want to watch the same thing in the movies.

However, this post.... *smiles* this goes out to my frien(d)zy!

Over and out.

This post chose not to have a title.

Aap udaas hona tou tarkk nahin karsakte, ke shayad aapke ikhtiyaar mein nahin. Magar haan... Agar aapki udaasi kissi aur ke ranj ka baa'is bun rahi hai tou aap apni udaasi ka izhaar karna zaroor tarkk karsakte hain.

And with that, I shall rest my case now.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.4

Kuch khusbu'ain, kuch aarzoo'ain

Har baar tujh se milte waqt

Tujh se milne ki aarzoo ki hai

Tere jaanay ke baad bhi meine

Teri khushbu se guftugu ki hai

Adjectives

Lonely.

Tired.

Sick.

Yupe, that pretty much describes me for now.

*a sad facepalm*

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.4

If truth be told..

Looking at you today... I just re-realised what I'm going to part with... I reckoned my loss, and the gravity of it all, once again.

And all of it made me sad, sad to my deepest core, my friend- amidst all that laughter and frivol. The vapid smiles that I kept managing, I had to try very hard for them, very hard, you must believe me.

There are moments, during the darkest of despair, when I want to ask the 'whys', but then again I  realize that I retain no such right. So, I just look down at my feet and kick off some dirt listlessly.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.4

Of Birdiees and Sugar Rushes...

'Awwww meri poor birdieeee.. =('

*bats eye lashes like a 3 year old staring at some shiny sparkly stuff*

.... O bloody hell!

*dies of a blissful sugar rush, with an ear to ear grin*

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.4

And a part of me died last night.

'Are we on the same page?'

'I can't say...'

'If we are on the same page, it'd be very scary... spooky.'

.....

'I think we are on the same page...'

-

How I wish we weren't.- or at least that you weren't on the page that I was on.

And my words left me then...

"What have we done, AH...? What have we done..."

"..........."

"What should we do now...?"

"..........."

Art movie

'Tum tou art movie bungai ho bilkul.'

'... Art movie? Kya matlab?'

'Haan, art movie- bohat he serious aur sober...'

'Achi baat hai.'

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.4