It's the irony, that's killing me....
Being the sinner that I am, I've always had it in my mind that I may not get what I pray for as easily as I would like to. However, I've always had faith in His mercy. And, He has been immensely merciful. I never thought I deserved all that I've ever had. I cannot thank Him enough. So, this isn't a complain. Not that I've any right to complain, in any case.
This is just a statement- of facts, of the way life works, and of irony.
I've always wished for a particular thing- Always. I wish I could explain to you the emphasis on 'always'. Yes, I've wished and prayed for it as much as I could've. I always hoped that Allah saa'iin would listen to me, despite all my sins. I had faith. But then again, somewhere at the back of my head, there was a fear lurking silently in a dark corner. What if.... what if my prayers go unheard; and all that only and only because of my sins. I thought perhaps the Lord might decide to punish me for my sins in this manner.
But, I was wrong. I've got what I wished for. But there's a twist (of course)...
And, the twist is.... that when I've almost got what i always wished for, I realise that I don't want it any longer. In fact, now I want not to have it!
May be it's a test. May be it's a retribution. Or may be, I am just being ungrateful.
2 comments:
Sins..Hope u have not done any tax corruption or bijli chori :p..Interesting read though..But I guess one loses the importance of a thing one gets especially if one gets it easily..May be because the challenge in getting that thing is finished. But often, one wish is replaced by the other after it is fulfilled..
tax corruption/ bijli chori?!
Haha. No, but things evil-er, grimmer, darker, scarier! *grins*
True. And, it's scary, only to begin with.
Post a Comment