*whispers*
Monday, August 29, 2011
In my head...
... It's a very cloudy day, tonight.
Grey and gloomy.
Suffocating, too.
The sun, however, tries pretty hard to peek out a bit. The heavy grey clouds are a little too overwhelming, even for that giant yellow light bulb up there. Yet, it manages a few peeks- once in a few many hours at most.
The clouds are grey. And gloomy. And heavy. But they won't pour, oh no. They're just being naughty.
-
Nothing new on the weather channel, huh. Let's watch cartoons.
Grey and gloomy.
Suffocating, too.
The sun, however, tries pretty hard to peek out a bit. The heavy grey clouds are a little too overwhelming, even for that giant yellow light bulb up there. Yet, it manages a few peeks- once in a few many hours at most.
The clouds are grey. And gloomy. And heavy. But they won't pour, oh no. They're just being naughty.
-
Nothing new on the weather channel, huh. Let's watch cartoons.
Sunday, August 28, 2011
=(
I need to talk. I really do need to talk to someone. Someone who'd listen...
I know that's too much to ask for... But, I'm really tired. I cannot go on like this anymore. Simply cannot.
And, I also cannot merely keep talking to myself (or to the blog, even blogging counts as talking to one's own self), or even pigeons, for that matter. Cannot talk to pigeons anymore. Yes, they're really good listeners but they just stare at you; and trust me, with their blood-shot (well, so they seem) eyes it's not much of a comfort, so to speak. I've been talking to pigeons all my life, I know how it is, okay!
I'm so so sooo unhappy right now.
*sighs*
P.S. I said I need to talk but, I've no idea what I want/need to talk about. Marvelous, is it not? *shakes head*
I know that's too much to ask for... But, I'm really tired. I cannot go on like this anymore. Simply cannot.
And, I also cannot merely keep talking to myself (or to the blog, even blogging counts as talking to one's own self), or even pigeons, for that matter. Cannot talk to pigeons anymore. Yes, they're really good listeners but they just stare at you; and trust me, with their blood-shot (well, so they seem) eyes it's not much of a comfort, so to speak. I've been talking to pigeons all my life, I know how it is, okay!
I'm so so sooo unhappy right now.
*sighs*
P.S. I said I need to talk but, I've no idea what I want/need to talk about. Marvelous, is it not? *shakes head*
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Soochta hoon...
'Kal bicharna hai tou phir ehd-e-wafa sooch ke baandh
Abhi aaghaaz-e-muhabbat hai, gaya kuch bhi nahin...'
Have been listening to qawwaliis for 3 days straight.
Qawwali ♥.
Sometimes, I think some amount of crudeness... is pretty awesome, and pleasing.
P.S. I have still not returned to my senses. I don't even know when I lost them, or where. *sulks* I feel so... angry? Great. So, I don't even know how or what exactly am I feeling. Doesn't get any better!
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Hi, it's me again
Where is everybody, when you need them?
Sighs.
I think I should give in now. There is no point anyways, and I am getting weary.
Really needed someone to crack me up a little...
But, I guess I'm just left with... myself, for now.
Night.
P.S. Papa, I miss you. And, I miss so many people. *shakes head* God! It's awful being sad and not knowing why.
Sighs.
I think I should give in now. There is no point anyways, and I am getting weary.
Really needed someone to crack me up a little...
But, I guess I'm just left with... myself, for now.
Night.
P.S. Papa, I miss you. And, I miss so many people. *shakes head* God! It's awful being sad and not knowing why.
Wayward wind
It's graver than you might imagine...
Not knowing what you would do with your life- it's tricky.
Not knowing what you would do with your life- it's tricky.
Monday, August 15, 2011
Almost..
It's as if someone pays you to go against me.
I wish you knew that you kill a tiny little part of me with your impertinence, every time. How long before you reach a cent percent, I can only wonder.
I wish you knew that you kill a tiny little part of me with your impertinence, every time. How long before you reach a cent percent, I can only wonder.
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Rain and a few laughs
The rain made me laugh today, in a very hysteric manner, that is. I kid you not.
It was a fit.
Rain is one beautiful thing.
It was a fit.
Rain is one beautiful thing.
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
De Facto
You're playing a game, that you will lose.
And, if you leave this game- you will be leaving a game that you can win.
Both the statements... are as concrete as your existence, and mine.
And, if you leave this game- you will be leaving a game that you can win.
Both the statements... are as concrete as your existence, and mine.
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Wacky, wackier, wackiest- just keeps getting better, uh?
*clears throat*
You?
Sunday, August 7, 2011
Hum dou'hri azeeyat ke giraftar musafir...
You cannot leave, can you now? It's too late, is it not? The path that you've chosen for yourself my love, aren't you aware isn't meant for you? Why would you, why would you go after something that you know isn't even real. Something that is but a mere figment of your imagination. An illusion. A mirage. A trick that your own mind is playing on you.
It's difficult. I know it's difficult when parts of your very own self turn against you. But you are no fool, or... am I mistaken again? Perhaps. It's been really long... It's been really long after all.
But you must understand, my precious. These paths that you're treading upon, they aren't yours. And there is no way you can make them yours. They belong to someone else. Let it go. Turn around, trace back your foot steps. I know. I very well know. It's too late now. I know it's too late to turn around. But there's still a chance.
You've walked farther into these lands than you should have, my dear. Much farther. There isn't much hope. Yet, believe me, and you will have to- a flicker remains. So, I suppose all is not lost my love. Not all. Not yet. Come back before you reach the point of no return. Before all that you have, is lost. Before there is nothing left- for anybody, anymore. Have mercy on yourself. Pray, have mercy.
Or, have mercy on these lands at least. Don't acquaint them with yourself so much. Don't let them fall in love with you. Don't inflict such misery upon them. They're alive, do you not see? Would you like for these marvelous, enchanting lands to turn barren? To end up into nothing but wretched, desolated waste lands. Would you want that? Can you be so cruel? Can you be so heartless? No! You cannot. You must not!
You have to leave. You have to- eventually. The sooner you leave, the better. Every next moment you spend here, you must understand, shall add to your dismay. Every passing second shall only make it twice as excruciating as it is now. Therefore leave, you must.
Leave! And, never look back. Or, you might as well turn into a stone, my precious- a stone.
It's difficult. I know it's difficult when parts of your very own self turn against you. But you are no fool, or... am I mistaken again? Perhaps. It's been really long... It's been really long after all.
But you must understand, my precious. These paths that you're treading upon, they aren't yours. And there is no way you can make them yours. They belong to someone else. Let it go. Turn around, trace back your foot steps. I know. I very well know. It's too late now. I know it's too late to turn around. But there's still a chance.
You've walked farther into these lands than you should have, my dear. Much farther. There isn't much hope. Yet, believe me, and you will have to- a flicker remains. So, I suppose all is not lost my love. Not all. Not yet. Come back before you reach the point of no return. Before all that you have, is lost. Before there is nothing left- for anybody, anymore. Have mercy on yourself. Pray, have mercy.
Or, have mercy on these lands at least. Don't acquaint them with yourself so much. Don't let them fall in love with you. Don't inflict such misery upon them. They're alive, do you not see? Would you like for these marvelous, enchanting lands to turn barren? To end up into nothing but wretched, desolated waste lands. Would you want that? Can you be so cruel? Can you be so heartless? No! You cannot. You must not!
You have to leave. You have to- eventually. The sooner you leave, the better. Every next moment you spend here, you must understand, shall add to your dismay. Every passing second shall only make it twice as excruciating as it is now. Therefore leave, you must.
Leave! And, never look back. Or, you might as well turn into a stone, my precious- a stone.
Friday, August 5, 2011
It's no use crying over split milk...
And therefore, we laughed.
Khairu just spilt all the milk all over the floor... and his face too. It slipped out of his hands. Albeit, how did he manage getting it all over his face is beyond my imagination and guessing abilities.
Instead of scolding him, everybody started laughing. Well, of course I didn't. Well, not initially. *tries not to laugh* I feigned a little anger, but then... I burst out laughing. I had to. He looked outrageously hilarious, you see.
Khairu just spilt all the milk all over the floor... and his face too. It slipped out of his hands. Albeit, how did he manage getting it all over his face is beyond my imagination and guessing abilities.
Instead of scolding him, everybody started laughing. Well, of course I didn't. Well, not initially. *tries not to laugh* I feigned a little anger, but then... I burst out laughing. I had to. He looked outrageously hilarious, you see.
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Errr... A li'l help here plzzz
I need an alibi (yes, I like using this word incorrectly, lol) to quit.
I cannot come up with any excuse that's convincing, but requires the least amount of explanation (read: lying).
Can you help? That'd be exceedingly nice of you and I promise I would stop hating you if you help. (*grins*)
I cannot come up with any excuse that's convincing, but requires the least amount of explanation (read: lying).
Can you help? That'd be exceedingly nice of you and I promise I would stop hating you if you help. (*grins*)
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Ramadan mubarak!
Can't sleep. There's too much on my mind...
Last ramadan, I was another person. Standing on the mark of almost a year, I'm another person altogether.
What changed? To this, I never found the correct answer- well, not yet.
Although, there is something I know. And that is, that this person has lost her connection with her Creator. As much as I regret, the truth remains that she isn't as close to her Sustainer as she once used to be, despite her vices.
I haven't been sad, for the most longest period as far as I can remember. But, I haven't been happy either. The only feeling that I've crossed paths with lately is agitation, discontentment.
From bad, to worse. What growth!
Help me Allah saa'iin.
Any-the-ways. This wasn't meant to turn out so remorseful, I don't know what happened. Read the title again, I had no intentions to make this post sound like what it does now.
But then, who cares. Hola! It's my blog. *smiles* Ramadan mubarak. Pray for me, won't you? Yes, you. Thank you. *smiles again*
Last ramadan, I was another person. Standing on the mark of almost a year, I'm another person altogether.
What changed? To this, I never found the correct answer- well, not yet.
Although, there is something I know. And that is, that this person has lost her connection with her Creator. As much as I regret, the truth remains that she isn't as close to her Sustainer as she once used to be, despite her vices.
I haven't been sad, for the most longest period as far as I can remember. But, I haven't been happy either. The only feeling that I've crossed paths with lately is agitation, discontentment.
From bad, to worse. What growth!
Help me Allah saa'iin.
Any-the-ways. This wasn't meant to turn out so remorseful, I don't know what happened. Read the title again, I had no intentions to make this post sound like what it does now.
But then, who cares. Hola! It's my blog. *smiles* Ramadan mubarak. Pray for me, won't you? Yes, you. Thank you. *smiles again*
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