Woe to the man, who finds not a thing of beauty in the rising and setting of the sun. Who ceases to be enchanted by the starry night sky. Who finds not a warmth in the charm of a crisp eve. Woe to him, as when it rains, not a smile kindles inside of him. Woe to him, who knows not bliss when the morning breeze caresses him. Who knows not of a delight creeping under his skin as the winter sun shines upon him. Who listens not, to the hushed chuckles of trees in the solitude of a windy afternoon. Who breathes in no pleasure from the soft morning dew. And woe be unto him, who looks at the bliss-ridden marvels around him, but with a numb stare. For what remains a difference betwixt him and a boulderstone?
Woe to you my precious, for what are you if not a boulderstone?
Showing posts with label Voices. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Voices. Show all posts
Sunday, November 24, 2013
Sunday, November 3, 2013
Monday, October 21, 2013
Friday, October 11, 2013
Kuj onj vi raahvaa'n okhiyaa'n san
...
Kuj gal vich ghamaa'n da touq vi si...
Kuj saajan kasar na chori si
Kuj zehr raqeebaa'n ghol dita...
Monday, October 7, 2013
Let's be honest
You don't need a friend, a lover, a healer.
You need an attendant.
Sighs.
... Where do we find you an attendant?
Friday, June 28, 2013
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Pophoo ne eik martaba bachpan mein meri donon hatheliyaan jorr ker haathoun ka baghour jaaiza lete huwe kaha tha ke, yeh jo ' ب ' (bay) ban raha hai na, kehte hain ke woh shaks barra bakht wala hota hai.
Uss lamhay nadaan sa zehra bohat khush huwa tha, mera tou bilkul perfect ب banta hai... kissi ne barray he rashk se soocha tha.
Aur aaj... jurri huwi hatheliyoun ke imperfect aur incomplete se ب ke saath, unki baat ka yaqeen karne ko dil chahta hai.
Uss lamhay nadaan sa zehra bohat khush huwa tha, mera tou bilkul perfect ب banta hai... kissi ne barray he rashk se soocha tha.
Aur aaj... jurri huwi hatheliyoun ke imperfect aur incomplete se ب ke saath, unki baat ka yaqeen karne ko dil chahta hai.
Thursday, December 13, 2012
... only too familiar.
Tum aaj bhi waheen kharri ho, they over heard someone whisper to her.
The voice continued resonating in the silence, until the whispers lurking in the distance raised their heads.
She's here again? But why? May be her compass is broken. Perhaps, she's going round in circles, without knowing. It's not the compass. I think it is. Wonder why her compass acts up with her all the time? Perhaps, it likes tricking her. Or.... may be, just may be, that compass of hers is a sadist who fell for her smile. Her smile? *said some in puzzled tone* Shush! Look at her... that smile. It's... bleeding. I know- isn't it beautiful? It... It sadly is...
Silence.
Stood there- she did, still as the night- only noticeable movement being the subtle movement of her pupils, the quiver of her lashes. She could hear them speak, those voices; hushed tones, whispers, piercing her senses without remorse. She could feel them- staring at her discreetly, from the darkness.
She doesn't seem to be in good shape. What did you expect? *someone berated* She hates it- being here. Why? *someone didn't know* It's only too familiar, of course....
A little too much.
Thursday, November 29, 2012
Khuser phuser
I wish to write- write again.
Of those voices inside my head. Voices that speak not to me, but to one another only. I am merely an uninvited audience; an eavesdropper perhaps.
But that doesn't matter.
What matters is that they've started whispering again, in hushed tones, and otherwise.
The voices, they're speaking again.
Of those voices inside my head. Voices that speak not to me, but to one another only. I am merely an uninvited audience; an eavesdropper perhaps.
But that doesn't matter.
What matters is that they've started whispering again, in hushed tones, and otherwise.
The voices, they're speaking again.
Monday, November 12, 2012
Unreasonable reasoning
Only if you could truly recollect and realise how little time we have- I have...
Perhaps then only you might have discovered reason underlining my unreasonableness.
Perhaps then only you might have discovered reason underlining my unreasonableness.
Saturday, May 12, 2012
If my memory serves me right..
There used to be a tree.
Tall and beautiful. Lush and fragrant. It stood there, in that soil. With such remarkable majesty. Evergreen, t'was- never saw it shedding leaves, no sir. I never witnessed such a thing happening. The winds swirled around it like a silly lad head over heels in love. The rays of sun shined each day to caress its magnificence.
The tree, that survived the toughest of times; endured the harshest of seasons, the cruelest of storms.
Where is it now? Whatever happened, pray tell me?
The twinges portrayed in the tone of the query had it all, anxiety, inquisitiveness, apprehension, concern; everything.
A courteous, yet vapid smile crawled across your lips as you tried to recollect the past.
The sediments of bitterness were stirred to an abrupt awakening, and went berserk.
The tree... is no more.
You wished to your heart's core that your reply be adequate to satisfy the curiosity. However, the rather perplexed set of eyes before you depicted everything, save satisfaction.
A silent sigh escaped your lips, as you shook your head slightly.
The tree, you speak of my friend, happened to nest minuscule specks on its magnificent branches, which turned out to be some kind of seeds. Seeds that the naive winds brought along with them. Or perhaps, it was some of those wonderful birds that used to add a vibrant grandeur to that natural structure. I cannot say, for I was heedless in a certain manner. Too much bliss- it does that to you sometimes.
I cannot say when they came, or where from. I cannot say how long they had been there. I only saw them when they showed themselves to me- and by then it was a little too late.
I became aware of their existence, only when they grew roots extending down from the branches. It was astonishing, or so I thought. I had never seen such a phenomenon before. They started growing aerial roots which twirled and twined around the trunk.
I am afraid, I was ignorant and naive. I could not foresee. I did not see it coming. They were benign little seeds after all, that were to grow into benign creepers or vines perhaps. I did not know. I did not know what fate had in store.
The roots they coiled all around the tree. They grew; and they grew stronger and stronger, until they ended up strangling it. They killed my tree.
What I perceived to be a harmless, if not mutually beneficial symbiosis turned out to be a figment of my foolish imagination, an illusion. An illusion that took away from me, for eternity, something that I cherished- rather, one of the only things I ever cherished.
Those parasites...
The voice quavered, as if with overwhelmed emotions and a brief pause followed.
The words that followed were more nonchalant, and the tone firmer.
The tall, magnificent tree that you ask of, my friend, isn't here anymore.
It's a memory now- A memory that, I am afraid, is fading away faster than I expected it to.
Tall and beautiful. Lush and fragrant. It stood there, in that soil. With such remarkable majesty. Evergreen, t'was- never saw it shedding leaves, no sir. I never witnessed such a thing happening. The winds swirled around it like a silly lad head over heels in love. The rays of sun shined each day to caress its magnificence.
The tree, that survived the toughest of times; endured the harshest of seasons, the cruelest of storms.
Where is it now? Whatever happened, pray tell me?
The twinges portrayed in the tone of the query had it all, anxiety, inquisitiveness, apprehension, concern; everything.
A courteous, yet vapid smile crawled across your lips as you tried to recollect the past.
The sediments of bitterness were stirred to an abrupt awakening, and went berserk.
The tree... is no more.
You wished to your heart's core that your reply be adequate to satisfy the curiosity. However, the rather perplexed set of eyes before you depicted everything, save satisfaction.
A silent sigh escaped your lips, as you shook your head slightly.
The tree, you speak of my friend, happened to nest minuscule specks on its magnificent branches, which turned out to be some kind of seeds. Seeds that the naive winds brought along with them. Or perhaps, it was some of those wonderful birds that used to add a vibrant grandeur to that natural structure. I cannot say, for I was heedless in a certain manner. Too much bliss- it does that to you sometimes.
I cannot say when they came, or where from. I cannot say how long they had been there. I only saw them when they showed themselves to me- and by then it was a little too late.
I became aware of their existence, only when they grew roots extending down from the branches. It was astonishing, or so I thought. I had never seen such a phenomenon before. They started growing aerial roots which twirled and twined around the trunk.
I am afraid, I was ignorant and naive. I could not foresee. I did not see it coming. They were benign little seeds after all, that were to grow into benign creepers or vines perhaps. I did not know. I did not know what fate had in store.
The roots they coiled all around the tree. They grew; and they grew stronger and stronger, until they ended up strangling it. They killed my tree.
What I perceived to be a harmless, if not mutually beneficial symbiosis turned out to be a figment of my foolish imagination, an illusion. An illusion that took away from me, for eternity, something that I cherished- rather, one of the only things I ever cherished.
Those parasites...
The voice quavered, as if with overwhelmed emotions and a brief pause followed.
The words that followed were more nonchalant, and the tone firmer.
The tall, magnificent tree that you ask of, my friend, isn't here anymore.
It's a memory now- A memory that, I am afraid, is fading away faster than I expected it to.
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
Treacly twinges of bliss
'... Promise me (...), promise me that...'
*shakes head*
I'm keeping my side of the promise... I don't know why, but I am.
May be it was that intense tone. There was desperation, concern, and a few other things may be, I don't know. Whatever it was, it was beautiful.
I know it was a mundane request, but I'm keeping up to it. I know it doesn't really matter whether I did keep it or not, as I already said, it was casual request after all. Whatever it was, you put up a good show- it left me wanting to abide by your request.
*shakes head*
I'm keeping my side of the promise... I don't know why, but I am.
May be it was that intense tone. There was desperation, concern, and a few other things may be, I don't know. Whatever it was, it was beautiful.
I know it was a mundane request, but I'm keeping up to it. I know it doesn't really matter whether I did keep it or not, as I already said, it was casual request after all. Whatever it was, you put up a good show- it left me wanting to abide by your request.
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Fragile, are we?
There rises an emotional surge or an uprising of a sort, to cave in sometimes, cave in to any and everything.
Sometimes- when you're walking on the edge; when you're a little too brittle on the inside.
When somewhere inside you a meek voice raises its head telling you that you cannot take it any longer.
When all your retaliations and rebellions switch to hibernation mode, and you are left with an odd self-defense mechanism- silence, surrender. And you look at yourself in the mirror in your head with a smirking awe; you never knew you had that potential in you, did you now?
Sometimes- when you're walking on the edge; when you're a little too brittle on the inside.
When somewhere inside you a meek voice raises its head telling you that you cannot take it any longer.
When all your retaliations and rebellions switch to hibernation mode, and you are left with an odd self-defense mechanism- silence, surrender. And you look at yourself in the mirror in your head with a smirking awe; you never knew you had that potential in you, did you now?
Saturday, March 17, 2012
Respite
You are the brief warm ray of sunshine on a cold cloudy day.
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Sunday, February 12, 2012
Of scents and sensibility
The sloth handed me an empty little bottle of scent a few days ago. Sloth's favorite scent, I reckon; it's some fragrance by Issey Miyake.
-
There were times when I could not comprehend what you were, what your existence was. However, this very moment, as I snuggled into the arms of an airy fragrance that caressed my senses - the answer occurred to me, like an epiphany only.
Khushbu! Khushbu ho tum. Eik aisi mehsoor-kun khushbu jo hosh-o-khirad per kaabiz hojaye. Eik aisi khushbu jo wujood ke har ik issay mein bas jaye; jo khud wujood ka hissa ban jaye. Aisi khushbu jo alam-e-wajd mein le jaye; jo aas paas se beygaana kardey. Eik aisi khushbu jo dil-o-dimaagh ke nihaan khaanoun mein kahin chhup kar baith jaye.
Haan, haan khushbu he tou ho; jo saari fiza mein muntashir ho jaye; aur phir har guzartey lamhe ke saath madhum se madhum tar hoti chali jaye, yahan tak ke mukammal taur per ma'dooum hojaye. Wahi khushbu jo koi bhoola bisra khayal ban jaye. Aur jo kabhi ye khayal yaad-e-guzishta ke band kiwaar khol kar maazi ke dareechoun se jhaankay tou... eik mubham se muskurahat taskeen-e-jaan ka baa'is ban jaye. Phir jab yaadasht per gard-e-waqt ki teh dabeez se dabeez tar hoti chali jaye tou mehaz ik pareshan yaad ban jaye. Eik aisa khayal jiska suraagh na lagaya jasakay.
'Yeh khushbu... issay janta hon mein... bohat manoos si mehsoos hoti hai, magar... magar kuch yaad nahi parta...'
Eik aisi khushbu jo waqt ke saath saath sha'oor se nikal kar lasha'oor mein bas jaye, aur phir- lasha'oor ke ghannay jungloun mein raasta bhatak jaye- humesha humesha ke liye...
Haan bilkul aisi he khushbu ho tum. Eik hoshruba khushbu, jissay eik din mere lasha'oor ke jungloun mein kho jana hai- humesha ke liye.
Kaash iss khushbu ko kissi sheeshi mein qaid kiya jasakta.
-
There were times when I could not comprehend what you were, what your existence was. However, this very moment, as I snuggled into the arms of an airy fragrance that caressed my senses - the answer occurred to me, like an epiphany only.
Khushbu! Khushbu ho tum. Eik aisi mehsoor-kun khushbu jo hosh-o-khirad per kaabiz hojaye. Eik aisi khushbu jo wujood ke har ik issay mein bas jaye; jo khud wujood ka hissa ban jaye. Aisi khushbu jo alam-e-wajd mein le jaye; jo aas paas se beygaana kardey. Eik aisi khushbu jo dil-o-dimaagh ke nihaan khaanoun mein kahin chhup kar baith jaye.
Haan, haan khushbu he tou ho; jo saari fiza mein muntashir ho jaye; aur phir har guzartey lamhe ke saath madhum se madhum tar hoti chali jaye, yahan tak ke mukammal taur per ma'dooum hojaye. Wahi khushbu jo koi bhoola bisra khayal ban jaye. Aur jo kabhi ye khayal yaad-e-guzishta ke band kiwaar khol kar maazi ke dareechoun se jhaankay tou... eik mubham se muskurahat taskeen-e-jaan ka baa'is ban jaye. Phir jab yaadasht per gard-e-waqt ki teh dabeez se dabeez tar hoti chali jaye tou mehaz ik pareshan yaad ban jaye. Eik aisa khayal jiska suraagh na lagaya jasakay.
'Yeh khushbu... issay janta hon mein... bohat manoos si mehsoos hoti hai, magar... magar kuch yaad nahi parta...'
Eik aisi khushbu jo waqt ke saath saath sha'oor se nikal kar lasha'oor mein bas jaye, aur phir- lasha'oor ke ghannay jungloun mein raasta bhatak jaye- humesha humesha ke liye...
Haan bilkul aisi he khushbu ho tum. Eik hoshruba khushbu, jissay eik din mere lasha'oor ke jungloun mein kho jana hai- humesha ke liye.
Kaash iss khushbu ko kissi sheeshi mein qaid kiya jasakta.
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
De Facto
You're playing a game, that you will lose.
And, if you leave this game- you will be leaving a game that you can win.
Both the statements... are as concrete as your existence, and mine.
And, if you leave this game- you will be leaving a game that you can win.
Both the statements... are as concrete as your existence, and mine.
Friday, June 3, 2011
The darkness, that swallowed me.
Why did I ever leave you? Why? And why did you let me go, back into those murky dark waters? Or may be you didn't. No. You didn't. You didn't let me go. I was the one who left you. I slipped out my hand from your hands. My love you for wasn't strong enough. My demons were stronger. I reverted back to the darkness that still thrived in some shady corners of my heart. The darkness took over me and swallowed my love for you with it.
My eyes were weak. The darkness that had grown on to me did not allow me to see the truth; the glory; you. I was foolish. I was ignorant. I was oblivious. I was walking farther and farther away from you, without even realising it. My mind did not recognise the darkness; my demons disguised it with light. My senses refused to even notice how dreary and grey this light was. And, so I kept walking.
My heart was silent. Silent as a grave. I realised not, that it was dying. Neither did I realise this silence to be the one that there is before a storm. So, I kept walking- into obscurity.
So, I kept walking- for days, and nights. I kept walking, until I it grew harder and harder for me to breath. Alas! The oblivion. I started gasping for air soon. Suffocated. I looked around, as if absurdly trying to see the air around me. I stopped. I had to. Every single muscle I moved seemed to rob me off the last bit of oxygen left in my blood. I inhaled as deep a breath as I could have, as if intending to inhale every single molecule of oxygen that was there around me. But, to no avail. There was none.
Panic started creeping into my skin. There was no air around me. I started gasping harder, louder and louder. My legs surrendered and brought me to ground. I was suffocating, right under an open sky. My heart raced faster, I could hear every single thud it made against my chest. My vision shrank. My head ached. Warm water seeped out of my eyes; eyes that had been dry ever since eons- it seemed. I was helpless, and alone.
The grey light grew dimmer and dimmer. I felt all walls closing in on me; except that there were no walls, anywhere. Fright penetrated the depths of my heart and then... And then, I thought of you. And then and only then, I realised my hand wasn't in yours. I tilted my head to look, tracking my eyes back on the path that I took here. My pupils dilated. Was it the shock, or the darkness? But what difference did it make? One or the same thing, weren't they?
There was no path. Only a haunting void. A vaccum. My heart stopped. My head fell back on ground. There was nothing. Except darkness. Above me. Below me. To my right. To my left. In every single direction, I saw it. Enveloping me, in itself. My body lay there on the ground, still as a corpse. The only thing negating death were my eyes, weeping; my lashes, shivering along with the eyelids. I wanted to scream- I had no voice. I wanted to call your name- I had no voice. All I wanted was to scream your name, but... I had no voice.
My eyes were weak. The darkness that had grown on to me did not allow me to see the truth; the glory; you. I was foolish. I was ignorant. I was oblivious. I was walking farther and farther away from you, without even realising it. My mind did not recognise the darkness; my demons disguised it with light. My senses refused to even notice how dreary and grey this light was. And, so I kept walking.
My heart was silent. Silent as a grave. I realised not, that it was dying. Neither did I realise this silence to be the one that there is before a storm. So, I kept walking- into obscurity.
So, I kept walking- for days, and nights. I kept walking, until I it grew harder and harder for me to breath. Alas! The oblivion. I started gasping for air soon. Suffocated. I looked around, as if absurdly trying to see the air around me. I stopped. I had to. Every single muscle I moved seemed to rob me off the last bit of oxygen left in my blood. I inhaled as deep a breath as I could have, as if intending to inhale every single molecule of oxygen that was there around me. But, to no avail. There was none.
Panic started creeping into my skin. There was no air around me. I started gasping harder, louder and louder. My legs surrendered and brought me to ground. I was suffocating, right under an open sky. My heart raced faster, I could hear every single thud it made against my chest. My vision shrank. My head ached. Warm water seeped out of my eyes; eyes that had been dry ever since eons- it seemed. I was helpless, and alone.
The grey light grew dimmer and dimmer. I felt all walls closing in on me; except that there were no walls, anywhere. Fright penetrated the depths of my heart and then... And then, I thought of you. And then and only then, I realised my hand wasn't in yours. I tilted my head to look, tracking my eyes back on the path that I took here. My pupils dilated. Was it the shock, or the darkness? But what difference did it make? One or the same thing, weren't they?
There was no path. Only a haunting void. A vaccum. My heart stopped. My head fell back on ground. There was nothing. Except darkness. Above me. Below me. To my right. To my left. In every single direction, I saw it. Enveloping me, in itself. My body lay there on the ground, still as a corpse. The only thing negating death were my eyes, weeping; my lashes, shivering along with the eyelids. I wanted to scream- I had no voice. I wanted to call your name- I had no voice. All I wanted was to scream your name, but... I had no voice.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Monday, April 18, 2011
Skidded off-road, have we?
I want to go back to the way I used to be.
Aloof. Disinterested. Indifferent.
Damnit. I don't like myself anymore, but then.... I don't remember liking myself- ever. Hah. *smirk*
Aloof. Disinterested. Indifferent.
Damnit. I don't like myself anymore, but then.... I don't remember liking myself- ever. Hah. *smirk*